There is something inherently scary about beginnings. At least to me. I want to see the end before the beginning. I want to know what I’m getting into. I want to wallow in the comfort of all that is familiar and known. Because it’s comforting. And I like comforting.
Beginnings also necessarily mean the end. Of something. Of the way things were. Of life as we knew it. Of sticking strictly to our comfort zones. And endings are often somewhat sad. Because of their permanence, because it means moving on and saying goodbye. It means relegating so many of the constant, everyday experiences to the memory realm and replacing them with new, unfamiliar, totally terrifying somewhat scary experiences.
This is probably why I’ve been thinking about starting this business for years, but not actually getting it off the ground. That, and because I simply didn’t know how. I didn’t know how to start a business. I didn’t know how to design a website. I didn’t still don’t know the ins and outs of marketing or bookkeeping or building an audience or a hundred other things. There is so much to know and do, so many decisions to be made and skills to be learned. It seemed, and still seems, endless and overwhelming.
But I finally pushed aside all the unknowns, all the knowledge gaps, all the fear and worry. I just jumped in. It’s time to sink or swim.